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Thread Box:
Hipsters Apologize For Wearing Masks
Thread started by PC at 08.7.08 - 5:10 am

Four hipsters publicly apologized yesterday for causing an outbreak of controversy by wearing masks to the opening ceremonies of the 2008 Hipster Olympics in the Bedford Stuyvesant neighborhood of Brooklyn, New York. The proceedings nearly came to a halt when Dakota Pierson, Ben Rugoff, Sara Devonshire, and Sunil Dhawan, representing a team from Echo Park, California, joined the parade with black bandannas covering the lower portions of their faces or hanging loosely around their necks.

In a joint statement issued this morning, the four young urbanites expressed "regret if [their] wearing of the masks was interpreted as a cheap appropriation of outlaw culture, a passé fashion statement, a double-ironic sendup of art scene conformism, or an attempt to elude capture by police after committing a violent crime," adding that they "just thought it was cool, or whatever."

In an exclusive interview today, Ms, Pierson told The Times that she had become attracted to the public wearing of masks while watching militant young protesters battling police during the Democratic convention in Los Angeles in 2000. "To be honest, the idea of trashing a Starbucks or chaining myself to a tree doesn't really appeal that much to me," the 31-year-old graphic designer said, "but I just love the way those kids walk around in their daily lives with their bandannas around their necks, like they might have to mask up at any moment. It's like, they've got this whole Cub Scout / train robber thing going on, and we all just think it's awesome."

Although the public apology may have repaired the teammates' relations with the officials of the Hipster Olympiad, the four have been criticized by commentators who accuse them of giving in to such powerful groups as the Southern California Anarchist Federation, the Singing Cowboys Guild, the Beekeepers' and Apiary Workers' unions, the Alliance of Crime-Fighting Superheroes Whose True Identities Must Be Kept Secret, and the formidable American Association of Old Ladies With Skin That Is Really Sensitive to Sunlight.

Ms. Pierson denies the charges, claiming that she and her teammates simply wanted to let their performance in the Hipster Games, rather than their politics or fashion sense, speak for them. "I'm totally over masks anyway," she said. "I just did a few days of work as a movie extra, and oh my God, I just loved how those production assistants hustled around all day, so full of competence and drive--I just couldn't stop thinking about how much I liked their style." She and her teammates plan to attend the closing ceremonies of the games with Motorola walkie-talkies and multiple rolls of gaffers tape hanging from their belts.

More Information:

Hipster Olympics

Howdy Doody

Anarchism


reply


so did we miss the "douche bag summer games in sunny santa monica"??

first link is pretty funny. especially the little "spotlights" on each person.

i'll check out the other links later.



deboRAWR
08.7.08 - 10:14 am

reply


Nice vid, but my head is 'bout to explode from trying to differentiate between a hipster, and an emo-kid.

There's one definite similarity though, I eat a Helluva more than both of these falsely, impoverished, jobless, living-off-of-parents, floppy-hairdo-having,
Telemarketer-wannabes!!!!



bentstrider
08.7.08 - 11:15 am

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Masked



marino
08.7.08 - 11:17 am

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Unmasked



marino
08.7.08 - 11:18 am

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Hey, it was dusty out there.



toweliesbong
08.7.08 - 11:19 am

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Nawww P is not a train robber. He would have been out there with us at Amboy, right?

He does ride a fixie though, so I'm not sure........

Damn life is so confusing!



User1
08.7.08 - 1:02 pm

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I apologize.



PC
08.7.08 - 2:40 pm

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PC,

You won't be forgiven about Burning Man.



Joe Borfo
08.7.08 - 2:44 pm

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sardonic critique of unimportant youth culture seems to be all the rage these days



hartwick, youre a pussy
08.7.08 - 3:33 pm

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I apologize.



PC
08.7.08 - 3:50 pm

reply


Masked



marino
08.7.08 - 5:37 pm

reply


Unmasked



marino
08.7.08 - 5:38 pm

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PC, you're a genius.



katiepoche
08.7.08 - 6:25 pm

reply


Those biters. I invented wearing an ironic beekeeper costume.



mullingitover
08.8.08 - 3:28 am

reply

Reply


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